Today it rained. And rained. It was difficult to motivate myself but I went again to the main train station this afternoon and offered myself for whatever needed to be done. The coordinator appraised me and asked if I was tough enough for a very stressful job. Today there were over 3,000 people in the station and many were feeling the effects of the rain. Many were without jackets of any kind and some had no shoes or only flip-flops. Donated clothing was available in the two tents that had been established for that purpose but the capacity of the tents was limited to about 25 or 30 people in need plus the volunteer staffing it. Those needing clothes were being allowed in only a few at a time as others left and this meant that there was a need for security people to control the flow.
So, I began my new volunteer career as a security guard with the warning that it was one of the most stressful jobs and that I would probably not be able to do it for very long. I would have to be tough and to expect a lot of conflict and challenge to my authority. Was I willing to maintain control and to exert my authority without concern for hurting people’s feelings and having “shit dumped on my head” (not literally, I hoped)? I honestly wasn’t sure whether I was up to this challenge but I remembered my intention upon starting on this journey to be open to whatever life presented and to respond with a “yes”. So I signed on to be a security person. And I found it to be one of the most enjoyable volunteer jobs that I’ve experienced this week.
When I showed up at the entrance to the clothing tents I found two tunnels created with two meter high fencing (what we used to call hog fencing on the farm) covered with a plastic tarp. These two tunnels contained the mass of people wanting to get into the tents. The one tunnel that was for men was filled as far as I could see. The other tunnel for women and children had only a few people in it. I got assigned to the men’s tunnel and was immediately told that the press of men was continually pushing forward beyond the end of the tunnel and that we needed to try and push them back. I was also told that we were only to allow two men at a time to enter the tents.
I took a deep breath and projected my energy in a spacious and confident but open way, I smiled at the first two men in line, told them to go on in and immediately stepped behind them to fill the space they had vacated. My fellow-volunteer followed my lead and, by repeating this maneuver a few times, we had the head of the line re-established back at the end of the tunnel.
With re-established of the line in the tunnel, I began smiling at each person as they arrived at the front of the line, saying hello to them and establishing a personal connection. Using humor and an open heart, I soon discovered that this security detail could really be fun. We were rarely able to understand each others language but we definitely communicated and in many many cases I felt a very strong personal connection that needed no words. We were not enemies or adversaries. It was not my intention to keep anyone from getting the clothes they needed and they could sense this. The more that we worked together to deal with the challenges of so many people and so much rain, the easier and more fun it was for all of us. I was really pleased and delighted to discover how easy it was to make personal connection and to express caring and respect despite the demands of the security position. Rarely ever did I have to exert authority and when I did, I tempered it with humor and we usually ended up laughing together.
The biggest challenge of the day (besides the constant rain that drenched me for the entire 4 hour shift) was some of the other volunteers who were dealing with their sense of responsibility and frustration by constantly exhorting the people in the tents to hurry up, to move on. It felt a bit like herding cattle and I could sense the energy level of the entire group responding to this urgency. These same volunteers also at times decided to invite ten men at a time to enter the tents. Whenever this happened, the entire line surged forward and far more than ten got past us and we had to exert authority to regain control of the situation. Every time this happened, it felt like we had to start over again to connect with the men and to engage them in working together to make the best of the situation.
Throughout the course of the afternoon, I came to love these people even more. I experienced them as generally friendly and cooperative people. I was impressed by their patience and by their genuine appreciation for the condition that we were in together. This position actually gave me a little more opportunity to interact and my impression was that most of these men are highly intelligent and quite positive and caring given the situations in which they find themselves. Some did not have jackets and patiently waited in the cold for their turn to get one. Some had little or no shoes. One man had a prosthetic leg with a shoe on the artificial foot and his other bare foot in a plastic bag. Unfortunately, there were almost no shoes available today. When we told this to the men in need, I did not hear anyone express anger or frustration, just a resignation and a hope that maybe things would be better tomorrow. It humbles me and inspires me when I consider all of the little things in my life that I do not handle with anywhere near that kind of acceptance and equanimity. These blessed people truly are my teachers.
My learning for the day is that so much is possible when I approach a situation with an open heart, kindness and a sense of humor. This invites a different quality of connection and relationship and opens the door for collaboration, even in something as simple as managing a queue. And when the focus is on relationship instead of control and exerting authority, unexpected magic can happen. I think that I discovered new capacity and possibility within myself that I hope I will be able to access in other situations.
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